Burnout, Bouncing Back, and Big Aha's: Redefining RestAug 16, 2023
Storytime with Ruby
For as long as I’ve been seeing my therapist, we’ve been stuck on repeat. Seriously, since Spring 2019, it’s like a broken record 80% of the time: schedule, calendar, energy, and the never-enough-hours-in-the-day saga. My schedule isn’t just a topic—it’s my confidante, my nemesis, my control freak's dream. Deep down, part of me is convinced: "Fix the schedule, find happiness." If only, right?
Honestly, I’m over it. Beyond over it. There's this voice in me, past the GCal alerts, screaming, "Ruby! Not the damn schedule talk again?! We've got way bigger fish to fry, girl."
And yet—wouldn't you know it— my most recent therapy epiphany was about (wait for it)... my schedule.
By mid-2021, I was emotionally fried. Crispy. Toasted. I know it wasn’t just me; we were all feeling the heat. But still.
That show-stopping realization that enough's enough? That’s when it hit me: I needed to hit pause. To breathe. To rest.
What snuck up on me? This sneaky self-blame. I’ve been secretly scolding myself for needing that rest, as if the burnout was some kind of punishment. “Did too much, Ruby. Overfilled that calendar (ahem), and look where it got you.”
Kudos to me, though (high five, anyone?), for taking that rest like a champ. I was running on empty, feeling like a zombie—and being tired made everything feel a million times worse. Thank heavens for falling head over heels for my husband, Jake, during this time. His love was like a soft pillow amid the chaos.
In 2022, I did a life 180. Sold my business, trekked across the country, and entered what I loosely call ‘rest mode’. But let’s be real: launching a podcast, planning not one but two wedding celebrations, jetting back to Athens monthly for teacher training, and setting up a new nest 1400 miles from the old one—that’s no one’s definition of resting!
There were days I felt like a ship without a compass—floating aimlessly. Planning our wedding? That was my lifesaver. The thrill of a creative project, a sparkly deadline—that's my jam.
But here's the raw truth: I was beating myself up—for not resting ‘right’, for resting ‘too much’, for not pulling in the big bucks. I even managed to collect some debt souvenirs from this ‘rest shame tour’. All because I was too darn stubborn to ask for a little help.
Now, I’m stepping back and seeing the whole, messy, beautiful picture:
Yes, I needed to hit the snooze button hard. But nope, I wasn’t just lounging around like a lazy cat.
Being a couch potato? We all need those days when we snuggle up like a French fry in front of our favorite show (hiya Carrie Bradshaw), and they’re guilt-free zones, promise.
Yes, rest is our secret weapon against burnout. But my Great Burnout of 2021? That wasn’t a personal failure; it was a life happens event. Because, let’s face it, life can be a beast.
Yes, making time for ease is vital, but the right kind of full schedule fuels me. I'm a high achiever, purpose-driven. Assign me a mission-based role, especially in the summer, and I’ll triple the output while cartwheeling through it.
What’s hitting home for me now? It's not about the grind vs. chill time; it’s about that sweet harmony between work and play.
Right now, my life is a colorful jigsaw: four varied jobs, weightlifting sessions, evening strolls, pottery class (who knew?), pickleball showdowns with the fam, wedding planning for my Mom, therapy check-ins, and loads of cuddles and hydration. My GCal is bustling, but my heart is beaming.
The key? It's all about how this bustling life feels—not how it might look on paper (or a screen). And hey, if that vibe changes, I’ve learned I can pivot. I’m basically an energy-ninja now.
So here’s our collective hug and heartfelt reminder: You, me, all of us? There is absolutely nothing wrong with any of us.
Cheers to full schedules (if that’s your groove) and to living this beautifully messy life to the fullest!
I see you picking up what I'm putting down,
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